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Shame is one of the most common sexual struggles. Shame is a social experience of feeling unworthy, unlovable, not belonging or lesser than. Shame tells us we have to hide parts of ourselves to fit in, get along or avoid rejection. Shame tells us we are broken, sinful, gross or otherwise unworthy of belonging.
Shame tells us if we were to be truly ourselves, we wouldn’t belong. Shame lies to us, and holds us all hostage in an invisible web-like grip of cultural myth and misinformation.
While not all shame is sexual shame, almost all of us struggle with some form of sexual shame – from body shame to faith-based shame, from kink shame to genital shame, almost everyone holds some form of shame around their sexuality.
A goal of shame resilience is to help those who feel shame feel empathy, connection, power, and freedom instead, emotions that can be considered the opposite of shame.