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A member of our community asked us about The Kivin Method cunnilingus technique.

In this week’s podcast, we review this technique and share what makes it work and what is just fluff.

So tune in (hit the play button at the top of this page!) and hear what makes this cunnilingus technique work – and join in our experiment to test some of it’s more questionable suggestions! Be a part of debunking (or proving!) this internet-famous oral sex position.

Ready to master Oral Artistry? Join our online course for an immersive exploration of oral pleasure for ALL bodies.

The Kivin Method Of Cunnilingus

No one knows where the Kivin method came from – most likely early internet forums, and the rest is urban legend.

Here are the full classic instructions for The Kivin Method (with Pleasure Mechanics commentary following!) We have updated the classic instructions replacing “man” and “woman” with “giver” and “receiver”

• • The giver lies perpendicular to the receiver at a 90-degree angle to their hip (put your face at a right angle to their pussy, rather than “head on”) 

• • The receiver’s only responsibility is to receive sensation (click here for more on the skill of receiving oral sex)

• • The giver uses a back-and-forth tongue stroke over the hood of the clitoris. Givers who have practiced this technique have said that when the receivers is aroused, they can feel two bumps on either side of the clitoral hood that feel like half grains of rice. These are the “K points” (when the clitoris is aroused and erect, it swells! Keep in mind here that the clitoris is the anatomical match to the head of the penis. So when erect, both reveal different textures and push nerve endings closer to surface)

• • The C point is how to get immediate feedback from the receiver that you are in the right place. The giver places their middle finger on the perineum, the C point, which is the muscular smooth area between the vagina and anus. Make sure your nails are short and that she can only feel your finger pad, not your nail.
  • The reason you will get immediate feedback is when your tongue is stroking in the correct place, the woman will experience involuntary, preorgasmic contractions in this area. (The entire pelvic muscles contract and expand during arousal, the perineum is just one great place you can feel it and respond to it!)
  • Your finger doesn’t move; it stays still, because if you do move your finger you may move her concentration from the clitoral hood area to the perineum (Perineal massage is actually AMAZING and can be a compliment to the oral stimulation of the clitoris. This is just one more tool in your approach at stimulating the entire sexual system. In all bodies the perineum is an amazing spot for stimulation. We offer a full suite of perineal massage techniques in the Foreplay Mastery Course)

• • By reading the recipient’s body, you will be able to maintain correct tongue placement without wondering, “Am I there? Where is there? Have I moved from there?” (Don’t stress too much about “correct tongue placement” as you will relax into it and your tongue and face will know how to move with and respond to your partner’s arousal!)

• • Once you have started, don’t stop. Continue past their initial orgasmic response, as often this stimulation is the most intense and satisfying portion of the orgasm. (Stop when they pushes your head away, grips your head and holds you still or bucks wildly away from you. Read their cues and ride it out together. And learn how to ride from orgasm to orgasm to explore multiple orgasms together!)

• Some couples have added a position adjustment: The receiver curls their legs up to their chest and the giver uses their arm to keep them pushed back and stabilized. In this way, the giver is very widely spread open and can receive even more intense stimulation. (Try lots of different oral sex positions! Facesitting anyone?)

The Kivin Method of Cunnilingus is just one more approach to experiment with together – what matters is finding the ways you love to play, bring one another lots of pleasure and explore high states of arousal. Don’t get stressed about any one technique or position – your two bodies need to fit together, as they are right now. Use pillows and props for added comfort. And remember that often it is the emotional blocks and distractions that get in the way of female pleasure, not the guy’s willingness to flick his tongue in the right spot (but great technique goes a long way, no doubt!)

Want more strategies to maximize female arousal and orgasm? Check out our Foreplay Mastery Course – here is what a few of our couples had to say about the course: