Articles — Page 157 — Pleasure Mechanics

Master The Edging Technique

What Is The Edging Technique?

One common technique to prolong arousal and increase sexual pleasure is called the “edging technique.” Sometimes it is called “peaking” or “surfing” – but all of these terms refer to a similar technique of maintaining arousal just below orgasm for prolonged periods of times.

The edging technique involves paying attention to your level of arousal, and developing your ability to know when you are getting close to orgasm. When you approach orgasm, you tone down stimulation or stop touching yourself and practice riding that edge – staying just under the threshold of orgasm.

If you want to prolong your arousal and delay ejaculation, edging is a technique to explore.

We guide you step by step in our Handbook on Ejaculation Control. It is part of our Foreplay Mastery Course.

Some people find the edging technique to be both effective and pleasurable, prolonging arousal and building up sensation towards a more intense orgasm. Other people get frustrated and don’t like the sensation of constantly “holding back” orgasm. Try it for yourself and see how it feels. Our Foreplay Mastery techniques will guide you through the strokes and strategies to create maximum pleasure while exploring the edging technique.

In masturbation, edging can be a really useful exploration, bringing your awareness to your arousal and experimenting with what it feels like to ride that edge of climax. You can experiment with different rhythms of stimulation, breathing techniques and body movements and learn about your arousal cycle. Edging sex techniques keep your solo sex life interesting and add an element of a challenge, building your skills each time you self-pleasure.

Once you master the edging technique in your masturbation practice, you can bring all of this self-knowledge to your lover and contribute to a richer partnered sex life. Explore edging with a partner if you want in-depth practice of communication. As your partner stimulates you towards climax, both of you then must become aware of your body and arousal – communicate about how close you are feeling and explore the sensation of staying just on the edge of orgasm.

Can your partner feel the tiny contractions of the pelvic muscles that precede orgasm? Can your partner hear your breath changing, notice the shift in your moans, or detect other signs of climax in your body? Explore ways to keep your arousal high, while incorporating more full body touch. Playing with maintaining arousal with a partner can be a great way to learn about one another, discover new techniques and learn to pay attention and communicate with both precision and passion.

Q&A: How Do I Make My Ejaculations Stronger?

Question:: When I was young I used to have strong ejaculations with plenty of ejaculate with strong ‘squirts’ up until i was in my 40’s. Since then it got to be less and less ejaculate. I’m in my early 60’s now and there is very little, a quarter teaspoon and it oozes out… no squirt for many years. What can i do to get the ‘squirt’ back.. more ejaculate.. is it possible? Doc says I have possible prostatitis and there is increasing PSA over the past couple of years… but still low numbers.

Hey there,

We are not doctors so can’t comment on medical issues: great that you are getting support in that area! Of course, things like good hydration, movement and healthy food will all have a strong influence on your sexual performance, so all of these areas are opportunities for optimization! Walking a few miles a day can do wonders for your sex life!

The best recommendation we can make for ejaculation strength is to relax chronic constriction in the pelvic muscles. Check out our guide on butt massage and the guide to prostate massage, both will give you powerful techniques to build strength and bring more vitality to your sexual system. You may also want to read our ebook on ejaculation control, which covers pelvic clenching exercises to gain strength and control over your ejaculations. You’ll find the guide to ejaculation control in our Foreplay Mastery Course.

Let me know if you have any more questions. Thanks for being in touch!

Chris

Prostate Masturbation Tips and Techniques

Many men enjoy including self prostate massage in their masturbation. By touching their own prostate, men can engage more of their sexual system, thereby enjoying more sexual sensation and improving health in the entire pelvis.

Prostate masturbation can include internal or external stimulation, with or without toys. The most direct way of milking your own prostate is via anal penetration. If you are flexible and can reach that far, you might be able to feel your own prostate with your fingers. Otherwise, you can explore the area using toys and pay attention to the sensations in your sexual system.

It can take some time to get used to new erotic sensations. You might feel numbness or even nausea at first when you explore anal stimulation. Over time (or sometimes right away!) that newness gives way to intense arousal, deep sensations and powerful orgasms. We get emails every day from guys saying “why did I wait so long to do this?” and “why isn’t every guy taught about prostate orgasms?”

To experience the most arousal from your anal and prostate masturbation, be sure to warm up with lots of external touch, slowly relax the anal sphincters first and only proceed to penetration when you are really relaxed and aroused.

We’ve been teaching guys and their partners about prostate massage for over 10 years now. While designed for partnered play, many of the techniques in our bestselling online course Prostate Massage Mastery (which includes the world’s best selling video about prostate pleasure!) can be used for self-prostate stimulation.

Tips for More Pleasurable Prostate Masturbation

Prostate Masturbation Toys

Using a toy such as the Aneros* or this favorite from Fun Factory can help you experience the full range of sensations, depth of penetration and kinds of stimulation that are available during prostate masturbation.

Many men enjoy using prostate masturbation toys* in the shower. Again, be sure to stimulate the external anal sphincters so you are relaxed and the toy penetrates easily. There never needs to be a moment of pain during anal stimulation.

External Prostate Masturbation

External prostate milking can be done via the perineum. You need deep pressure to reach the prostate through the sling of muscles that comprise the pelvic floor. Push deeply along the perineum and see if you can feel sensation in and around your prostate. Do this while stroking your penis for maximum pleasure.

Make sure you are highly aroused while stimulating the prostate. Prostate stimulation feels best for most guys when done in combination with genital stimulation. The more aroused you are, the more swollen and pronounced the prostate will be, making it easier to locate and stimulate with your finger.

Internal Prostate Stimulation

Wear a glove for easier clean-up and to free yourself the distraction of being worried about touching your butt. Over time you’ll notice that with a little preparation, there is nothing gross to worry about!

Once your finger is inserted, feel towards the front of the body and try to locate the walnut shaped prostate gland. Many men can not reach deep enough to feel their own prostate.

It may take several sessions of prostate stimulation for the sensations to turn into intense pleasure. Many men experience tenderness or numbness at first. Allow yourself to explore the sensations without too many high expectations at first. Many men report that prostate sensation is a learned pleasure!

Positions for Prostate Masturbation

Manually stimulating your prostate can be a pleasurable and healthy part of your masturbation. Most men who are interested in exploring this pleasure find themselves limited only by flexibility – it can be extremely challenging to contort your body into a position for prostate masturbation and yet relax enough to enjoy it.

Try reaching both forward between your legs and from around back, or one hand going each way. Try lying on your side, on your front and back, standing or squatting. Use pillows to elevate your hips.

Stand with one foot on a chair or stool and then reach with one hand behind you. This opens up the pelvis and may allow for deeper self penetration.

Feeling fit? Drop into a deep squat and try penetrating yourself from this position. This position may help you penetrate with more ease, but most guys can’t hold a squat long enough to explore getting aroused in this position.

Be creative enough to see if there is a position comfortable enough to reach both your penis and your anus – the rewards are well worth the effort. If you simply can not reach, and many men can not, try using toys to extend your reach. Or, get your lover on board and save anal play for partnered explorations.

Master The Art Of Prostate Massage

Unleash the Power of Prostate Orgasm With Our Online Course: Prostate Massage Mastery

* please note some links on this page are affiliate links, and if you choose to make a purchase we will receive a small percentage as thanks for the referral. We only link to resources we know, trust and love!

What Is Prostate Milking?

As the producers of the world’s bestselling video guide on prostate massage-now part of our Prostate Massage Mastery online course, we receive a lot of questions about prostate milking like: What is prostate milking? How is prostate milking different from prostate massage?

What is Prostate Milking?

Prostate massage is sometimes called prostate milking. This is because stimulation of the prostate helps release fluid from the prostate gland. Prostate milking can either be part of an ejaculatory orgasm, usually through a combination of prostate massage and genital stimulation. Sometimes, however, prostate milking is performed without genital stimulation and a small amount of clear fluid is released through the urethra. This form of prostate stimulation is sometimes done for health purposes, or as part of an erotic relationship using orgasm tease and denial.

How is Prostate Milking Different from Prostate Massage?

Prostate milking is really just another term for prostate massage, with more of an emphasis on the stimulation and release of fluid from the prostate gland. The techniques are the same. If you want to learn how to milk the prostate and explore prostate orgasms, check out our online course: Prostate Massage Mastery.

Why Is Prostate Milking Healthy?

Many doctors recommend prostate massage to maintain the health of the prostate gland. When prostate massage is done strictly for health reasons, and not as a sexual activity, it is sometimes referred to as milking the prostate. Prostate milking is focused on draining the fluid from the gland, encouraging blood flow and fresh fluid production, flushing stagnant fluid out of the area and releasing chronic tension in the pelvis. There are theories that stagnation causes the build up of toxins and the cell mutation that can lead to prostate massage, prostatitis and prostate inflammation. If you are interested in the health benefits of prostate massage, talk to your doctor about prostate milking.

Does Prostate Milking Require a Prostate Orgasm?

It is much more pleasurable to milk the prostate in combination with arousal and genital touch. As sex educators, this is the combination we teach in our video guides. You can, however, massage the prostate without erotic stimulation and release fluid from the prostate gland without a prostate orgasm. This will lead to a clear fluid being released through the urethra – clear because it does not contain semen which is normally found in an ejaculate.

Ready to explore prostate stimulation and prostate orgasms? Check out our online course, Prostate Massage Mastery to get started tonight!

The Blowjob Swallow Debate

Blowjob Swallow

Comment::

Hi. I really liked your article on yourtango.com about how to give a blowjob. Especially your answer to the comment about the blowjob swallow debate. I loved your idea of thinking of swallowing as honoring and respectful and oral sex as a gift. That’s a great way to put it!

I find it strange and annoying when sex experts or authors of books or articles on blowjobs spend more time explaining ways to avoid letting guys cum in your mouth when you’re sucking their penis or ways to avoid swallowing. I’ve never understood why that would be more enjoyable for the guy, or even for the girl giving the blowjob.

Your comment reminded me of a friend I had in school, she got into oral sex before I did and helped me out with tips when I was starting out. She felt that a guy’s cum was her reward for the blowjob. I always thought that was a cute way of looking at it, and when you actually think that way while you’re going down on someone it really makes you look forward to the guy getting off in your mouth. And when you think about it, it kind of makes sense. Isn’t it a privilege to be able to make men release their semen into your mouth just with a little attention from your lips and tongue? And like you said by swallowing it’s like your honoring that event. To me at least it’s deeply satisfying and exciting to feel a man’s orgasm and his ejaculation through my lips and tongue.

I think this topic would make for a helpful article on your site, btw. Thanks for your positive attitude about it. Your article put me in a mood to give a blow job, or two! 😉

Megan

A:: Thanks for writing in, Megan, about your feelings in the great blowjob swallow debate! Some women may never want to swallow, and that is their choice. What is essential is that we honor our bodily fluids as part of the gift of our incredible human sexuality – when we talk about the “blowjob swallow” as something nasty and disgusting, we disrespect the male body. We think it is time to reframe the conversation and allow ejaculates to be honored – and that can include a “blowjob swallow” or not! Whether or not you want to swallow, we recommend mastering handjob skills! Being able to give a great handjob makes oral sex way more pleasurable, and if you aren’t in the mood to swallow you can finish him off with your hands and choose where the ejaculate lands!