Articles — Page 133 — Pleasure Mechanics

Sex Songs

What do you listen to while making love? We want to know what sex songs fuel your erotic expression. Let us know in the quick survey below, and we’ll create a public playlist so you can refresh your sexual playlist and discover new sex songs to inspire you.

Take more sex surveys now!

Many people find music to be an important part of the sexual experience. Specific songs can trigger powerful emotional memories, so be deliberate about what you cue up before getting in the zone. Every couple must find their own sex songs to create the kind of mood they want each time they make love. We recommend creating multiple playlists for different kinds of sex, songs that make you feel romantic are quite different than songs that make you feel rowdy and rough.

As we gather the survey results we will create a shareable playlist of sex songs, the ultimate guide to music to get you in the mood. Share your favorites to help create the ultimate sex songs playlist!

The Erotic Bucket List

The Erotic Bucket List is designed to inspire you to start thinking about having sexual experiences, rather than just having sex. For a fulfilling sex life, you must choose to go beyond your comfort zones and break out of your ruts to stretch your erotic boundaries. The experiences listed in this book are invitations to memorable, meaningful and stimulating sexual adventures.

This book is an ongoing collaboration. We invite you to contribute stories and testimonials of your own erotic adventures, suggest new entries for the list, and share artwork for the book.

Take more sex surveys now!

Are you an artist? Get in touch with us to submit your art, illustrating or inspired by one of the adventures on The Erotic Bucket List.

Wife Doesn’t Want Sex? Here’s What To Do!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Tune in on: Spotify | RSS

It is very common for one person in a relationship to want sex when the other isn’t in the mood.

Mismatched libidos can quickly turn a relationship sour.

In this episode, we answer a listener’s question about what to do when her husband wants sex and she isn’t up for intercourse.

We offer lots of great strategies for keeping intimacy alive even when intercourse isn’t an option.

Pleasure Mechanics Guides Mentioned In This Episode:

Foreplay Mastery

Couples Massage Mastery

Sexual Fantasy

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Tune in on: Spotify | RSS

This episode was originally published in 2013, and updated in 2021 as Speaking of Sex episode #387, Fantasy Vs. Desire

Ever wanted to share a fantasy with your lover, but had no idea how to get the conversation started?

In this podcast, we share the best ways to get your lover to share a sexual fantasy with you.

We start by exploring the crucial difference between a sexual fantasy and a desire, and then offer strategies for getting your lover to open up and share with you. Talking about fantasies and naming desires is an incredibly vulnerable act, but one that can have huge benefits for your relationship and your sex life.

In this episode of our Speaking of Sex podcast, we answer a listener’s question about getting his wife to tell him what she liked about 50 Shades of Grey, but no matter what your literary preferences, you can benefit from being more honest and transparent about your fantasies with your lover.

Resources Mentioned In This Episode

How To Kiss

Kissing is one of the most basic and essential erotic acts. Yet it is not as simple as locking lips – there are many ways to kiss and learning how to kiss your lover in the way they like to be kissed is well worth it. Once you master the basics of how to kiss you’ll be able to pay more attention to each intimate moment with your lover and enjoy the intimacy of each kiss you share.

Some people like small tender kisses, other people like big wet kisses with lots of tongue. Explore the whole range with each new lover to discover exactly how to kiss that specific person for maximum pleasure. Here are a few general tips on how to kiss with more skill and confidence.

How To Kiss

Here is a classic move to initiate a kiss. Start by making long eye contact, then look at the person’s lips, and back to their eyes. Lean forward slightly and then pay close attention to their cues. Do they smile and lean forward? Or do they hesitate and pull back? This is a pretty great way to know if the person wants to kiss you.
Take it slow. Start with a soft kiss on just the lips, or maybe even the cheek, forehead, or wrist. This helps establish contact and turn up the heat. Being a tease is WAY sexier than being over eager.
Don’t be overeager. Let the kiss “bloom” – kiss the lips first, and if the kiss wants to heat up your lover’s mouth will open to you, never shove your tongue in.
Let your lover kiss you, receive the kiss rather than be desperate and take over. Kissing is like a dance where your lips and tongue meet, you want to play on that edge and not be too pushy.
If you can, use your hands on the rest of your lover’s body. Gently rest your hands on the shoulders, play with the hair, wrap one arm around the lower waist, etc. Make it a full body experience.
Take breaks. if the kiss was good and there is chemistry, you can always start up again. don’t feel the need to kiss for minutes on end all the time
Follow your lover’s lead. Most people kiss how they want to be kissed, so pay attention to what your lover is doing and return that style.